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Any sufficiently advanced technology is indistinguishable from magic. -- Arthur C. Clarke ... read more

You might be smart with computers, but in real life you are a complete idiot. Programmer, data entry clerk, whatever. How have you not gone insane already!?Put some clothes on! Nobody wants to see that. ... read more

I stumbled upon these old photos and couldn't resist writing this. They were such GREAT dogs. First, it was Joey. Then C ... read more

No Service. That's what my phone said when I arrived at the restaurant to pick up my teenage daughter. I couldn't text her to say I'd arrived. I would have to do the unthinkable: Get out of the car, physically walk in, and risk human int ... read more

There's always room for satire hereLondon -- Leaked reports reveal that on Wednesday, dbut Hawaiian novelist Barack Hussein Obama II, 49, will win the Lost Man Booker Prize, one of the world's most prestigious literary awards, with No ... read more

continued from Hiking with ElizabethThe scariest part was when we stopped. Then he stopped. I had my phone in hand, looking at the map. There was a tense moment until he smiled and said, Y'all lost?Just ... read more

Elizabeth received a birthday card from Grandpa today with $20 inside! She said, I love your dad! Tell him thank you very much! Your dad is rich! I wouldn't have thought such an old old person would have so much money! ... read more

That's all I wanted to say. :)We had a shortened visit with Elizabeth today because we had to first stop by the pharmacy and get ... read more

Everyone is wanting an update! Well, we're parents of a two-year-old now. No time for updates!She is keeping us busy. Her favorite things to do are: play in the sink, play in the tub, and play in the toilet. She is a waterbaby! One of th ... read more

We just got back from today's first visit with the child (we're not supposed to mention her name online). We'll be going back this afternoon. In the meantime, Tara's trying to catch up on her sleep. She had woken up around 5 this morning ... read more

We made it. The flight was horrible. I think I slept about 30 seconds out of the 11 hour flight. It was not a full flight, and half the people around us were able to take up two or three seats, but we weren't quick enough. The other mov ... read more

It's amazing the level of self-loathing. These people are certifiable. A California educator has demanded that schools in the state ignore 'privileged white voices,' and argued that the curriculum should be even more anti-white than it al ... read more

The primary method for accomplishing this feat, according to the plan, will be by reducing US employee head count by 78 percent in that time frame. Read, listen or watch the rest here: ... read more

Ah, the good ol' days when the shelves were full! Click the image. ... read more

They think burying a tree will keep the CO2 in the tree from going back to the atmosphere? Yeah, if you're an idiot who says trust the science but don't know that MICROBES eat trees and it will get back into the atmosphere that way. On ... read more

In just the past month, more than 600,000 people in an increasingly housebound world have signed up for Yale's The Science of Well Being, a course originally taught on campus by psychology professor Laurie Santos. ... read more

Behind the Eight Ball Who is that behind the eight ball, anyway?Vol. 6 No. 5, Au ... read more

The Sacred CowVol. 5, No. 2, March 15, 1993 Dad sucked from plane!Well, almost. And it was 41 years ago. Hey, nobody can accu ... read more

NEWS Vol. 3, No. 5, July 6, 1991Northern California's leading newsletter since 1989 (except for those few months when we were Southern California's leading newsletter) Record heat melts Sacto!Molten ... read more

The Holmes Family Newsletter Vol. 1, No. 4, August 1, 1989 Largest Tri-Weekly Newsletter Circulation in the West! tri-weekly (tri-week'lee) 1. we TRY to get it out weekly) Editor's Note: This will probably be the last issue. See article ... read more

The Daily Gargoyle Vol. 2, No. 14, November 16, 1990 Just when you thought it was safe to open the mailbox!Editor's note: For those of you who actually believed, or hoped, ... read more

The Holmes Family Newsletter Vol. 1, No. 6a, September 17, 1989Everyone seems to be on a diet these days. Lucy and Jeannie are trying a low carbohydrate/high protein diet. Don's trying good old reliable starvation. Eleanor is on the Nu ... read more