Below is everything (newest at top) with "family+holmes+newsletter" in its title or subcategories.Vol. 1 - 1; 2; 3; 4; 5; 6; 7; 8; 9; 10 | Vol. 2 - 1; 2; 3; 4; 5; 6; 7; 8; 9; 10; 11; 12; 13; 14; 15 | Vol. 3 - 1; 2; 3; 4; 5; 6; 7; 8 | Vol. 4 - 1; 2; 3; 4; 5; 6; 7; 8 | Vol. 5 - 1; 2; 3; 4; 5; 6; 7; 8 | Vol. 6 - 1; 2; 3; 4; 5; 6; 7 | Vol. 7 - 1 | Vol. 8 - 1HOLMES FAMILY NEWSLETTER( family / holmes / newsletter )
FAMILY NEWSLETTER( family / holmes / newsletter )Old stuff, but some of it's still funny ... It's basically the precursor to this website. Click the links in the table of contents, above. Otherwise, just do a search in the home page's search box for newsletter (without quotes).... read more HOLMES FAMILY NEWSLETTER VOL 8 NO 1( family / holmes / newsletter )
HOLMES FAMILY NEWSLETTER VOL 7 NO 1( family / holmes / newsletter )The Wandering Eye Vol. 7 No. 1, March 19, 1995We're back! Sorry it took so long between issues, but the entire staff was frozen solid in a block of ice the past three months. We just now thawed out. You know how it is. We should have known better than to visit Antarctica in winter. We figured, hey, it's south, it must be warm. Oh well, liv... read more HOLMES FAMILY NEWSLETTER VOL 6 NO 7( family / holmes / newsletter )
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HOLMES FAMILY NEWSLETTER VOL 5 NO 5( family / holmes / newsletter )
HOLMES FAMILY NEWSLETTER VOL 5 NO 4( family / holmes / newsletter )Not Just Another NewsletterMONDAY, JULY 19, 1993CIRCULATION: From 8 to 15 (depending on our mood and how many stamps we have)Copyright 1993 / Enterprises / 2 pages BILL ARRESTEDThat's right. Bill, this newsletter's editor, was arrested -- twice! -- last month and released on his own recognizance by the almighty California Highway Patrol. Hi... read more HOLMES FAMILY NEWSLETTER VOL 5 NO 3( family / holmes / newsletter )
HOLMES FAMILY NEWSLETTER VOL 5 NO 2( family / holmes / newsletter )
HOLMES FAMILY NEWSLETTER VOL 5 NO 1( family / holmes / newsletter )
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HOLMES FAMILY NEWSLETTER VOL 4 NO 5( family / holmes / newsletter )The Broken Record Vol. 4, No. 5, June 25, 1992Predictable, irritating. Really, no redeeming qualities whatsoever.L.A. riots: The aftermath In the aftermath of the Los Angeles riots, religious and community leaders speak of healing, rebuilding, minority empowerment ... Enough already!!! If I hear the words aftermath, healing, or rebuilding o... read more HOLMES FAMILY NEWSLETTER VOL 4 NO 4( family / holmes / newsletter )
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HOLMES FAMILY NEWSLETTER VOL 4 NO 2( family / holmes / newsletter )The Leaky Faucet Vol. 4, No. 2, February 13, 1992 The quintessential newsletter. Warning: May not be suitable for the humor impaired. Elvis lives!Yes, all your prayers have been answered! The King is alive and well! We know this for a fact because we saw it on a t.v. special hosted by Bill Bixby, The Elvis Conspiracy. Elvis is now apparently... read more HOLMES FAMILY NEWSLETTER VOL 4 NO 1( family / holmes / newsletter )The Leaky Faucet Vol. 4, No. 1, January 4, 1992Everything you've ever wanted to know about anything. Diane has surgery On December 3, Diane of Hayward, CA had back surgery done on her back (always a good place to have back surgery). And, apparently, everything went well and she is now convalescing at home. Candy and flowers are now being acce... read more HOLMES FAMILY NEWSLETTER VOL 3 NO 8( family / holmes / newsletter )The Leaky Faucet Vol. 3, No. 8, December 10, 1991 Steve & Denise host ThanksgivingTurkey was served and everybody ate it. What else is there to say? Okay, so it was an excellent meal thanks to the efforts of Denise and those who brought side dishes. And the dinner rolls were especially good.Doug provided before-dinner entertainment with the obligat... read more HOLMES FAMILY NEWSLETTER VOL 3 NO 7( family / holmes / newsletter )The Leaky Faucet Vol. 3, No. 7, October 14, 1991 Mike lands great job!Michael has been named Executive Producer of Cal State Stanislaus' new bi-weekly cable television show. It will basically be a show focusing on happenings on campus, and Mike is in charge! We asked Mike how he got such a great job, and he said, I don't know, really. They... read more HOLMES FAMILY NEWSLETTER VOL 3 NO 6( family / holmes / newsletter )The Leaky FaucetIrritating, yet soothing. Obnoxious, yet hypnoticVol. 3, No. 6, July 30, 1991Sapphire dispute settled out of courtSteve of Sacramento, CA, invested in a sapphire venture a few solar eclipses back. He was to be guaranteed 25% profit, with the possibility of 100% profit. Well, the deal went sour. Steve's partners lost most of ... read more HOLMES FAMILY NEWSLETTER VOL 3 NO 5( family / holmes / newsletter )
HOLMES FAMILY NEWSLETTER VOL 3 NO 4( family / holmes / newsletter )the Evening Star Post-Tribune Dispatch (we couldn't decide on a name) Vol. 3, No. 4, June 4, 1991 Bikers ride to YosemiteOn Mother's Day, John, Jeannie, Don and Diane (collectively known as Hell On Wheels) rode their motorcycles to Yosemite. We had a great time, Jeannie, the club spokesperson, said afterward. On their return trip they s... read more HOLMES FAMILY NEWSLETTER VOL 3 NO 3( family / holmes / newsletter )and now...THE NEWS Vol. 3, No. 3 (yes, only No. 3)April 26, 1991Doug returns from Hungary On March 21, Doug left Sacramento for Budapest (pronounced booda-pesht), Hungary. Taking advantage of a tickets-for-mugs trade with American Airlines (no kidding!), he flew from Sacramento to Chicago and then to Munich, where he caught a train to Budapest.... read more HOLMES FAMILY NEWSLETTER VOL 3 NO 2( family / holmes / newsletter )the NEWSLETTER Vol. 3, No. 2 February 10, 1991 It's a girl... and a boy and a girl and a boy... Chance, a dog, has given birth to seven little dogs. Three boys and four girls! Hasn't she ever heard of birth control? The puppies' names (though Jeannie will never admit it) are: Delta Dawg, Delta King, Delta Queen, Desert Shield, Desert S... read more HOLMES FAMILY NEWSLETTER VOL 3 NO 1( family / holmes / newsletter )news from La-La Land HAPPY NEW YEAR!!Vol. 3, No. 1, January 4, 1991 Newsletter editor murdered!The editor of this newsletter was apparently murdered some time over the weekend according to police. We think it was our editor, anyway. Nobody's actually ever seen him, so we couldn't identify the body. This edition was quickly put togeth... read more HOLMES FAMILY NEWSLETTER VOL 2 NO 15( family / holmes / newsletter )NEWS, ETC. Vol. 2, No. 15, December 18, 1990Christmas Issue Lucy to Host ChristmasLucy will be having Christmas at her house this year. It's a potluck affair. Only those with food will be allowed in. Says Lucy, It'll be very informal. No dinner table. If you have someplace else to go, feel free. Well, she sounds excited, doesn't she... read more HOLMES FAMILY NEWSLETTER VOL 2 NO 14( family / holmes / newsletter )
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HOLMES FAMILY NEWSLETTER VOL 2 NO 12( family / holmes / newsletter )The Newsletter Vol. 2 No. 12, September 17, 1990Your Only News Source It's a girl!!We asked Denise if she could hurry up and have the baby because we wanted to put out this issue. And, sure enough, she had the baby two weeks early! Wasn't that nice? The bouncing baby girl, Kristen, was born sometime after midnight, September 9, and Denise... read more HOLMES FAMILY NEWSLETTER VOL 2 NO 11( family / holmes / newsletter )the NEWSLETTER Vol. 2, No. 11, August 13, 1990 Doug makes pilgrimageDoug, aka Sluggo, made a pilgrimage to the Mormon church's genealogical library in Salt Lake City over a week ago and hasn't been seen since! Several theories have been put forward in an effort to explain his missingness, but we think ... Update: He's just called th... read more HOLMES FAMILY NEWSLETTER VOL 2 NO 10( family / holmes / newsletter )Things You Need To Know Vol. 2, No. 10, July 16, 1990 Pioneer Portuguese now availableWorld famous Portuguese historian Lionel Holmes's latest work is now available at a store near you. Don't be surprised if they're sold out. Sales have been brisk. Quick, order one today! Dad had his picture taken and will be interviewed today, Monday... read more HOLMES FAMILY NEWSLETTER VOL 2 NO 9( family / holmes / newsletter )WORLD NEWS Award-Winning JournalismVol. 2, No. 9, June 14, 1990 Dad kills rattler! Special to the NewsBack from a week in the wilds of Arizona, Dad and Eleanor told of battles with man-eating coyotes and vicious attack-rattlesnakes which Dad wrestled barehanded to save countless maidens in distress from fates worse than death. Baloney aside, Dad ... read more HOLMES FAMILY NEWSLETTER VOL 2 NO 8( family / holmes / newsletter )The Holmes Family Newsletter Vol. 2, No. 8 Anniversary IssueMay 25, 1990Editor's Note: This is the big one! The big enchilada. The killer tomato. It's the anniversary issue! (Aren't you excited?) It was one year ago today that a young man with a dream founded The Holmes Family Newsletter, only to be arrested and declared criminally... read more HOLMES FAMILY NEWSLETTER VOL 2 NO 7( family / holmes / newsletter )the NEWS Vol. 2, No. 7, May 1, 1990Editor's Note: We would like to apologize for that last issue, but we won't. We'd like to say it'll never happen again, but hey... Mike gets jobMike has taken a job as a process server for a Modesto private investigation firm. He had job offers coming in from everywhere, of course, but Mike chose... read more HOLMES FAMILY NEWSLETTER VOL 2 NO 6( family / holmes / newsletter )the NEWS Vol. 2, No. 6, April 16, 1990Back in spite of popular demand. WORLD NEWS Mike is back from Germany and looking very European. (Fancy haircut, pale complexion, but otherwise healthy.) He's having trouble getting used to speaking English again. But then, he always did have trouble with that. Greg visited Sacramento last week to report ... read more HOLMES FAMILY NEWSLETTER VOL 2 NO 5( family / holmes / newsletter )Big News & Other Stuff Vol. 2, No. 5 Yeah, another new name. March 19, 1990 Mike to return earlyMike has had a change of plans and expects to return from Germany at the end of March, assuming his mom can afford the return airfare. Otherwise, Mike runs the risk of being stuck in Germany and getting drafted into the German Army! Or maybe being forc... read more HOLMES FAMILY NEWSLETTER VOL 2 NO 4( family / holmes / newsletter )
HOLMES FAMILY NEWSLETTER VOL 2 NO 3( family / holmes / newsletter )Billy Club Vol. 2, No. 3, February 8, 1990 aka Bullseye, Hard Copy, The Holmes Family Newsletter A newsletter for the 90s and beyond!Diane now a doctorCall her Dr. Holmes now. Diane Holmes, D.C., to be exact. She passed her exams last month and is now officially a chiropractor! Diane stated,It wasn't easy. There were hardly any multiple ch... read more HOLMES FAMILY NEWSLETTER VOL 2 NO 2( family / holmes / newsletter )
HOLMES FAMILY NEWSLETTER VOL 2 NO 1( family / holmes / newsletter )
HOLMES FAMILY NEWSLETTER VOL 1 NO 10( family / holmes / newsletter )The Holmes Family Newsletter Vol. 1, No. 10 -- Worldwide Circulation -- December 6, 1989 Newsletter sold! The Holmes Family Newsletter was involved in a hostile takeover. A group of Japanese investors have taken control of the Newsletter by means of a leveraged buy-out. Luckily, they're letting Bill keep his job as editor. However, they insist ... read more HOLMES FAMILY NEWSLETTER VOL 1 NO 9( family / holmes / newsletter )The Holmes Family Newsletter A Newsletter With A Mission In Life! Vol. 1, No. 9 Worldwide Circulation November 21, 1989 The Environmental Issue Only 34 days 'til Christmas And where will this year's celebration be? Well, Lucy has offered to sacrifice her house for the cause. But, if you want to host A Holmes Family Christmas at your house, ... read more HOLMES FAMILY NEWSLETTER VOL 1 NO 8( family / holmes / newsletter )The Holmes Family Newsletter Vol. 1, No. 8, October 23, 1989 earthquake! Where were you when it hit?Don was just leaving his office on the 15th floor in downtown San Francisco when the whole building started to shake. I survived, said Don. But it definitely wasn't fun. It was the scariest 15 seconds in my life. Diane was at a conference in... read more HOLMES FAMILY NEWSLETTER VOL 1 NO 7( family / holmes / newsletter )The Holmes Family Newsletter Vol. 1, No. 7, October 5, 1989Let's face it, these things are going to just keep coming. Steve arrested... read more HOLMES FAMILY NEWSLETTER VOL 1 NO 6( family / holmes / newsletter )The Holmes Family Newsletter Vol. 1, No. 6a, September 17, 1989Everyone seems to be on a diet these days. Lucy and Jeannie are trying a low carbohydrate/high protein diet. Don's trying good new reliable starvation. Eleanor is on the NutriSystem plan. Bill is on a junk food diet. And Steve, of course, is always on a diet due to his lifelong weig... read more HOLMES FAMILY NEWSLETTER VOL 1 NO 5( family / holmes / newsletter )The Holmes Family Newsletter Vol. 1, No. 5, September 5, 1989 Jeannie breaks elbow Placed on Disabled ListLathrop -- While attempting a sling-shot maneuver during a roller derby match last month with teammates Tiffany and Thomas, Jeannie went over the railing and broke her elbow. Jeannie stated, You should see the other guy! Tiffany and Thomas... read more HOLMES FAMILY NEWSLETTER VOL 1 NO 4( family / holmes / newsletter )The Holmes Family Newsletter Vol. 1, No. 4, August 1, 1989 Largest Tri-Weekly Newsletter Circulation in the West! tri-weekly (tri-week'lee) 1. we TRY to get it out weekly) Editor's Note: This will probably be the last issue. See article below. Newsletter Held For Ransom!The Newsletter's religious advisor, Oral Hershiser, received a ... read more HOLMES FAMILY NEWSLETTER VOL 1 NO 3( family / holmes / newsletter )The Holmes Family Newsletter Vol. 1 No. 3, July, 1989Editor's Note: Due to profanity, nudity, and the mature theme of this issue, parental discretion is advised.Mike made the Cal State Stanislaus Dean's List for the '88-'89 school year! There was a BIG write-up on him in the Chronicle -- the Livingston Chronicle. Well, it wasn'... read more HOLMES FAMILY NEWSLETTER VOL 1 NO 2( family / holmes / newsletter )The Holmes Family newsletter June 23, 1989 -- Vol. 1, No. 2 -- Since 1989Editor's Note: This may be the last issue. NEWSJeannie's dog, Chance, finally had her puppies. Ten of twelve survived, eight of which are female. And they're on sale this week! Jeannie was quoted as saying Our prices are so low, it's INSANE! SPORTSDad and E... read more HOLMES FAMILY NEWSLETTER VOL 1 NO 1( family / holmes / newsletter )The Holmes Family Newsletter Vol. 1, No. 1, Since 1989May 25, 1989Editor's Note: This may be the only issue, so pay attention! AnnouncementsWell, the big news, of course, is Steve and Denise's engagement. The wedding is set for the weekend before Thanksgiving, I think, so be sure and make plans accordingly.Lost & FoundYes, Doug is still ... read more |
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