Notes From The Road To Doug's House... And Mark Twain's Boyhood Home

by bill - 2024-10-31 ( life / travel / usa / missouri ) [html version]

Just past Jackson, Tennessee, after getting onto 412, a trucker had some fun at my expense. I had just passed him and am 99% sure I hadn't merged back in front of him too close. Drivers around here are offended easily. He then came up fast behind me and got right up to my rear-end before finally getting into the left lane to pass me. He then made a point of coming back into my lane just barely in front of me. I flipped him off but don't know if he saw me. Okay, so maybe I'm easily offended, too.

Crossing over the Mississippi River into Missouri was cool, as usual, but also sad. It really does seem to be going dry. There are huge sandbars/dry sections now. What feeds into the Mississippi, anyway? I know the Ohio River does. Are farmers siphoning off all that water along the way or is there just not as much precipitation to the north anymore? I'll have to look that up.

Had lunch at Subway in Van Buren, Missouri. It was that or McDonald's. The total for my meal was $11.07 -- the Gatorade probably added at least $3 -- and the woman behind the counter said, "That's my birthday! I'll be 21!" She was clearly joking, looking at least 30. I said, "My birthday is coming up. I'll be 22!" She knew I was lying, but said, "Well, happy birthday to you, too!"

I had meant to stop before that in Poplar Bluff like I had last year, coming home, but never saw the street with the A&W and Mexican restaurant I'd found last time. This time, once I realized I had driven through the entire town and was back on the highway, I just figured I had to catch the next town, Van Buren. There's a speed trap after that Subway/McDonald's/Sinclair gas station stop. Just over the hill out of view is a cop waiting for speeders in that 55mph zone surrounded by 70mph zones. I'd noticed him pulling a U-turn in front of me in one of those little "authorized vehicles only" cut-throughs just prior to my stopping for gas.

Arriving at Doug and Jana's house, I was surprised by all the large vehicles. He's got three trailers, as in tractor-trailers, with one of those having the "tractor" attached. He says he can register that as a farm vehicle to save money on yearly registrations, which is nice. He's also got a back-hoe that he says is a bit tricky to maneuver. Last time he used it, he had to have one son pressing a particular button to keep the "kick-stand" thingies up, and the other son doing something else – I already forgot what – just to get the machine from here to there. Once there, though, it works fine. Hey, it was cheap. He buys these things at auctions.

Their youngest son was out front when I pulled in. Doug and their dog Scooby came out a few seconds later. Scooby tried to attack me when I went to hug my brother hello. No joke. He barked, growled, and bumped me with his chest. Probably thought I was attacking his owner, though he eventually got used to me. Doug never has. They were surprised by Scooby's aggressiveness, but I was not. That dog has never liked me. He's a large shepherd/Doberman-maybe/hound-dog mix, and should know me by now. He finally did allow me to pet him under the chin and around the ears while in the house.

Doug and Jana have done a lot of work on the place since I visited almost exactly a year ago. They have big plans for the future, but I can't tell you what those plans are. I was sworn to secrecy. The gun to my head convinced me. I am joking now, but he did ask if I wanted to shoot guns. I declined, having no interest. My daughter has tried to get me to do the same back home at a nearby gun range whose owner she is friends with. I said I'd do it if it meant that much to her, but really could not care less about such things. I own a gun and know how to use it, just don't feel the need to shoot it unless absolutely necessary.

I did put her target practice sheet – a 2 foot by 3 foot piece of paper full of bullet holes – on the "sports" wall in my office in her honor. My office wall decor is divided into "animals," "music," "travel," and "sports." It’s like Jeopardy! categories of all my favorite things. I should add "food" and "entertainment" walls – two more favorite things – but doubt Tara would be okay with adding walls to the office.

Jana provided home-made baked goods, of course, which were all delicious. Then she gave me a glass of raw milk, also delicious, that they get from a nearby farmer. I was a little hesitant, afraid of a bad reaction so far from home, but I took a chance, and lived to tell the tale. I even got to say hello to her brother -- they Skype each other regularly -- who I'd met at their wedding 28 years ago. Sadly, their father had just recently passed away.

Leaving Doug and Jana's house after only three hours – this was just a two-day, one-night trip and I had places to be – I gave them the traditional gift of two banana peels. It's a tradition now, anyway. It's what was left over from my road-trip snacks. Doug said it would be a great addition to their compost, and accepted my gift with the utmost appreciation.

I spent that night in St. James, Missouri, just east of Rolla at the Greenlight Inn.. Nice hotel. Right next to I-44, but quiet (that night, at least) and fairly cheap, especially after my Expedia discount. I was finally able to watch a World Series game there. We don't get Fox or ABC at home, and the Series was on Fox. The score was 6-4, Yankees over the Dodgers, in Game Four when I fell asleep. I'm an early-to-bed-early-to-rise type. I'm writing this the next morning – around 5:30 – and will have to get online to see if there will be a Game Five. The Dodgers were leading the series 3-0 before last night.

There's no coffee-maker in my room, the Manatee Room. Next door is the Dolphin Room. It’s a good room with a den/office area in front. It even has a small refrigerator, just no coffee-maker. I'll have to wait until 6:30 when the free breakfast opens up downstairs. They might at least have coffee, though, so I'm going down there in a minute.

It was dark and scary down there just now, but then, it is the day before Halloween. Luckily, the juice and coffee machines seem to work 24/7, so I had two cups of orange juice and a cup of coffee. Back in my room, I've got time for a shower before breakfast, followed by a 2+ hour drive north to Hannibal, Missouri, Mark Twain's boyhood home. I hope rush-hour traffic near St. Louis isn't too bad.

Hannibal was nice. I bought a couple of t-shirts at the Mark Twain Museum. I'll let the photos below and this video here tell most of the story, but will mention the gift store/soda shop off Main street. I searched for a nativity scene there for Tara – she collects them – but ended up with a butterscotch root beer float. After I got home, my wife and daughter both cringed at the sound of that, but I said, "No, it was delicious."

UPDATE/SPOILER ALERT: The Yankees won Game 4, so there was a Game 5. There will be no Game 6 because the Dodgers came from behind and won the World Series after five.

You'll probably need to zoom-in/enlarge most of these images to read the signs. Or, just visit visithannibal.com