RSS feed humor

The Good Old Days

( culture / humor / shopping )
Ah, the good ol' days when the shelves were full! Click the image. ... read more

Dirt Bikers Make Use Of Sand-covered Skate Park In California

( life / people / humor )
Officials in a California city buried a popular skate park in sand to deter skateboarders from violating coronavirus lockdown orders, but the sand- ... read more

Ohio Brewery Planning World's Largest Virtual Toast

( culture / humor / rss / humor )
An Ohio brewery is inviting beverage fans of all ages to participate in a record attempt for the world's largest virtual toast. ... read more

Olive Garden Offers To Edit Together Faux-prom Photos

( education / news / rss / humor )
Restaurant chain Olive Garden is helping out high school seniors whose proms were canceled due to the COVID-19 pandemic by offering to simulate the ... read more

LA Skate Park Covered In Sand To Prevent Gatherings

( life / people / humor )
A popular skate park in California was filled with sand to discourage gatherings after officials said numerous violations of coronavirus lockdown p ... read more

Goose Lays Egg At British Train Station

( education / news / rss / humor )
Police in Britain shared photos of an unusual sight encountered by an officer -- a goose that settled down to lay an egg at an empty train station. ... read more

Lions Take Over Road Amid Tourist Ban In South African Park

( culture / humor / rss / humor )
A pride of lions in a South African national park took advantage of the peace and quiet of the COVID-19 lockdown by lounging in the middle of the r ... read more

Chicago Man Charged $11,500 For $90 Worth Of Groceries

( education / news / rss / humor )
A Chicago man who racked up a $90 tab at a grocery store didn't realize until he got home that he had been charged more than $11,000. ... read more

Streaming Service Offers $1,000 To Watch 24 Hours Of True Crime

( culture / humor / rss / humor )
A video streaming service is seeking a true crime buff to make $1,000 during the coronavirus lockdown by watching 24 straight hours of documentarie ... read more

Diploma Carried Away By Georgia Tornado Found 30 Miles Away

( education / news / rss / humor )
A Georgia man whose diploma was among the objects carried away by a tornado was reunited with the document after it was found 30 miles from his hom ... read more

Maryland Police: Remember To Wear Pants While Checking The Mail

( culture / humor / rss / humor )
A Maryland police department shared a cryptic warning to a local resident who apparently has a habit of checking their mail without pants during th ... read more

Wet Wipes Clog All Four Pumps At Florida Wastewater Facility

( culture / humor / rss / humor )
Utility officials in a Florida county are reminding residents not to flush wet wipes down the toilet after all four of the wastewater facility's pu ... read more

Groundhog Enjoys A Slice Of Pizza Outside Philadelphia Woman's Glass Door

( education / news / rss / humor )
A surprised Philadelphia woman captured video of an unusual sight right outside her sliding glass door: a groundhog happily munching away on a slic ... read more

Indiana Man Finds Mysterious $82 Million In Bank Account

( culture / humor / rss / humor )
An Indiana man awaiting his $1,700 stimulus payment said he checked his balance at an ATM and instead discovered a mysterious sum of $8.2 million. ... read more

Peacock Gives Authorities The Slip In Texas City

( education / news / rss / humor )
Police, animal control officers and firefighters in Texas are hot on the trail of an unusual fugitive -- a peacock that has repeatedly given them t ... read more

Training Mortar Round Found Buried In Nebraska Man's Yard

( culture / humor / rss / humor )
A Nebraska bomb squad was called to the home of a resident who was doing some landscaping in his yard and discovered what appeared to be an unexplo ... read more

Man Working In Garden Finds Car Buried In His Yard

( culture / humor / rss / humor )
A British man who decided to build a deck in his garden during coronavirus lockdown made an unexpected discovery -- an entire car buried in his yar ... read more

Firefighters Free Stag With Antlers Caught In Soccer Net

( education / news / rss / humor )
Firefighters in Britain responded to a soccer field to rescue a stag found with its antlers entangled in a goal net. ... read more

Toilet Paper Roll Cakes Save Finland Bakery From Closing

( culture / humor / rss / humor )
A bakery in Finland said it was spared going out of business thanks to a unique creation that went viral on social media: cakes shaped like toilet ... read more

Humor Admid Official Overreaction

( culture / humor / jokes )
Half of us are going to come out of this quarantine as amazing cooks. The other half will come out with a drinking problem. I used to spin that toilet paper like I was on Wheel of Fortune. Now I turn it like I'm cracking a safe. I need to practice social-distancing from the refrigerator. Still haven't decided where to go fo ... read more

Georgia Bar Pays Unemployed Staff With Dollar Bills Stapled To Walls

( education / news / rss / humor )
A Georgia bar owner said a tradition of customers stapling dollar bills to the business' walls is allowing her to distribute $3,714 to her now out- ... read more

Moose On The Loose In Ontario City For Several Days

( culture / humor / rss / humor )
Police in an Ontario city are warning residents to keep their distance from a moose that has been on the loose in the city for at least four days. ... read more

Loose Lion Wanders Streets Of Indian City

( education / news / rss / humor )
An Indian Forest Service officer shared video of an even more compelling reason to stay home than the coronavirus -- a lion wandering the streets. ... read more

Mangled English

( culture / humor / english / humor )
This is pretty old, from the old newsletter in 1992, when the Soviet Union still existed, but it's still funny How English is Being Used in Different Parts of the World IN A TOKYO HOTEL: Is forbitten to steal hotel towels please. If you are not person to d ... read more

Stray Puppy Brought Home By Construction Worker Turns Out To Be Fox Cub

( culture / humor / rss / humor )
Animal rescuers in Britain said a man who brought a stray puppy home from a construction site later discovered the animal was actually a fox cub. ... read more

Bandanna Fashion

( culture / humor )
Nobody bats an eye now when I walk into a bank or store with a bandanna wrapped across my face. Of course, the gun is still a sure giveaway. ... read more

Truck Load Of Toilet Paper Burns In Texas Highway Crash

( culture / humor / rss / humor )
Authorities in Texas said a truck driver was not injured when his vehicle caught fire on the interstate, but the flames destroyed some precious car ... read more

Man Uses Bucket Truck To Visit Mom's Third Floor Window

( education / news / rss / humor )
An Ohio man unable to visit his mother's nursing home due to coronavirus lockdown used a tree-trimming bucket truck to visit her third floor window ... read more

Police Chase Moose Through Idaho City

( education / news / rss / humor )
Residents of an Idaho neighborhood watched an unusual police chase unfolding outside their homes when a moose went for a run through town. ... read more

Boat Bucks Driver, Keeps Doing Donuts In Potomac River

( education / news / rss / humor )
Emergency responders in Washington, D.C., were called to the Potomac River to stop a motorboat that kept moving in circles after its driver fell ov ... read more

Leopard Captured After Wandering Into House In India

( education / news / rss / humor )
Wildlife officials in India said a leopard wandered into a city and was captured about five hours after it was spotted inside a house. ... read more

Kayaker Attempting To Circumnavigate All Five Great Lakes

( culture / humor / rss / humor )
An endurance kayaker is 26 days into her attempt to circumnavigate all five Great Lakes -- a distance of about 4,200 miles. ... read more

Subway Surfer Clings To Side Of Moving Train In New York

( education / news / rss / humor )
A New York subway rider was caught on camera taking social distancing too far by clinging to the outside of a moving train. ... read more

Wild Cougar Wanders Empty Streets Of Chile's Capital

( culture / humor / rss / humor )
A wild cougar made its way to the Chilean capital and spent about 15 hours wandering the city's empty streets before being captured by police and v ... read more

Colorado State Parks: 'Thank You For Not Stealing Our Toilet Paper'

( culture / humor / rss / humor )
Colorado Parks and Wildlife is offering an unusual message of gratitude to state park visitors: Thank you for not stealing our toilet paper.& ... read more

Missing Dog Turns Up Two Years Later, 136 Miles From Home

( education / news / rss / humor )
An Australian dog who went missing when a storm damaged a fence was found two years later while wandering 136 miles from home with a pair of new pu ... read more

Disneyland Closure Ends Man's 2,995-day Streak Of Visits

( culture / humor / rss / humor )
A die-hard Disney fan who has visited California's Disneyland theme park every day for more than eight years ended his streak just shy of 3,000 day ... read more

Company Seeks Job Applicant To Test Out Luxury Dubai Apartment

( culture / humor / rss / humor )
A real estate website is seeking a job applicant to fly to Dubai and spend a week testing out a luxury apartment. ... read more

Tigers Block Forest Officials' Vehicle In India

( education / news / rss / humor )
An Indian Forest Service official shared video of a pair of tigers blocking the path of an official's vehicle while on patrol in a wooded area. ... read more

Rope Ladder, Cot Used To Hoist Leopard Out Of Well

( culture / humor / rss / humor )
Animal rescuers in India got creative with a rope ladder and a cot to rescue a leopard that fell into a deep well. ... read more

Company Offers $1,000 To Watch 10 Movies On St Patrick's Day

( culture / humor / rss / humor )
A San Francisco career resource company is offering an unusual dream job of its own: getting paid $1,000 to spend St. Patrick's Day watching Irish ... read more

Massachusetts College Holds 'fauxmencement' For Seniors

( education / news / rss / humor )
Seniors at a Massachusetts college held a "fauxmencement" ceremony, complete with garbage bag gowns and yarn tassels, to replace their li ... read more

Thieving Dog Steals Packages From Texas Family's Porch

( culture / humor / rss / humor )
A Texas family who suspected a porch pirate had stolen a package from their front door checked security camera footage and discovered the culprit w ... read more

Treasure Trove: Five Strange And Valuable Thrift Store Discoveries

( culture / humor / rss / humor )
Thrift stores have long been hot spots for treasure hunters and bargain seekers, but sometimes the donated items turn out to have downright shockin ... read more

Pangolin Wanders Into Family's Home In India

( education / news / rss / humor )
Wildlife officials in India were called to a village to remove a rare pangolin that wandered into a family's home. ... read more

Random Observations

( culture / humor / humor )
Miscellaneous Had alarm set for 4:15a.m., but the trash collectors in the alley behind my hotel thought 3:30 would be better. At the airport, I was busted for trying to sneak contraband mouthwash and sweet tea through security OK how are you supposed to cut a mango? No idea. Wife said she wanted a collander. I thought i ... read more

Joke Images

( culture / humor / jokes )
All joke images on this site ... read more

Get Into Farming

( culture / humor )
Some bad language, but funny. Get Into Farming ... read more

Memes About Memes

( culture / humor / internet )
A couple of good ones. one two ... read more

British Problems

( culture / humor )
Stumbled upon this and thought I'd share. Here's a sample... Look, buddy, I get it . You have a Ferrari and you "wanna go fast" like Ricky Bobby but maybe central fcking London isn't the place fo ... read more

Restroom Difficulty

( culture / humor / stories )
Don't you hate it when you're at work? The end. Wait, that's not the end. You're at work — on the bottom floor, because that's where the snack machine is — and you decide to use the restroom. The cleaning lady is in there, with her cart blocking the door. So, you take the stairs back to your floor, the sixth, because you haven't m ... read more

More Miscellaneous Jokes

( culture / humor / jokes )
Screw in a light bulb Q: How many Star Trek crew members does it take to screw in a light bulb? A: Six. Scotty to get on the intercom when the light goes out and say, I canna do it, Cap'n! I'm not a miracle worker!; Spock to tell Kirk he is proceeding illogically; McCoy to say Dammit Jim, I'm a doctor not an electrician!; ... read more

Russia-gate, Explained

( education / news / politics / humor )
This pretty well sums up the stupidity known as Russia-gate: russiagate cartoon. And, can we please stop adding gate to the end of every scandal? Millennials are too young to remember Watergate, the original gate. Thank you for your coope ... read more

Couple Of Good Ones

( culture / humor / jokes )
OK, three good ones. and and, this just in, something to settle the argument... ... read more

Taking The Stairs

( culture / humor )
Don't you hate it when you're taking the stairs, looking down because it's a struggle, you think you've reached your floor only to look up and see you've got two more to go? Working on the third floor is rough! ... read more

Worrying Works!

( culture / humor / jokes )
Worrying must work because everything I worry about ends up not happening! ... read more

Too Funny

( culture / humor / transportation )
This is too funny not to share. See German man's car found 20 years after he lost it in parking garage. "Almost every driver has been there — when parking in a large lot or garage, it ca ... read more

Trail Of Blood

( culture / humor )
Walking in from the parking lot into work this morning, on the sidewalk I saw what looked like a trail of blood. There was a big spot of it at the top of the sidewalk, and it dwindled as it continued downhill toward the front door. What the...? This building is out in the middle of formerly beautiful countryside. Maybe a coyote (or a pack) killed a ... read more

Lesson On Taxes

( culture / quotes / humor )
The best way to teach your kids about taxes is by eating 30% of their ice cream. — Bill Murray ... read more

Wife's Jetta

( culture / humor / transportation )
Driving wife's Jetta while my car gets serviced. I called it a piece of $h! while I tried to climb out. Its door hit me in the forehead during the struggle. So, I guess we're even. ... read more

If A Man Speaks In The Forest

( culture / humor / jokes )
Joke we heard Lee Child telling (though we're fairly sure he's not the author)... "If a man speaks in the forest and his wife is not there to hear it, is he still wrong?" ... read more

Out Of Toothpaste

( culture / humor )
Me (joking, the other day): I'm out of toothpaste! Whaddaya gonna do about it? Wife (without missing a beat): Find a husband with toothpaste, I guess. And that, ladies and gentlemen, is why I married her. :) And that's why I'm at the store right now, buying toothpaste. ... read more

Awkward

( culture / humor )
So, I'm walking back from feeding the neighbor's dog while they're on vacation. I see my wife and daughter in the car up ahead, just about to turn onto our street. I'm looking at them. They're looking at me (or at least it feels like it). They're still about a hundred yards away, so I'm not entirely sure. To be silly, I pretend to try and hide behi ... read more

Cereal

( culture / humor )
I think I'm addicted to cereal, I said. Addicted? she asked. Yeah, I'm gonna hit the street looking for my latest fix. And by 'street,' you mean Aisle 3 at Kroger, right? Don't question my street cred! ... read more

This Is Deep

( culture / humor / blog / internet )
I just had to share this comment someone left here on FriendsNews.com. Read it, absorb it, digest it, lather, rinse and repeat it. Then let me know what the %$# it means! Here it is: "I comprehend that is genuinely uninteresting and you're merely skipping to the next comment, nonetheless i basically preferred to toss a s ... read more

Doing The Dishes

( culture / humor / blog / humor )
So, my wife tells me most people do the dishes every day. I don't believe her. Every day? I ask.Yes, every day, she says.Every single day? I persist. She nods. You don't mean, I search for clarification, it's something that is an 'every day' thing, but in reality is not done literally every single day, do you?No, she i ... read more

Cleanliness Counts

( culture / humor / computers / humor )
Click on this link to clean the inside of your screen: yahelite.org/lol/screenclean.swf ... read more

So God Made A Dog

( culture / humor / pets )
I love this. via So God made a dog "And on the 9th day God looked down on his children and said they need a companion, so God Made A Dog. Paul Harvey-style tribute to dogs." ... read more

How Hubbard And Rand Got Their Ideas

( culture / humor )
According to this video, this must be how it happened. UPDATE: "How Ayn Rand and L. Ron Hubbard Came Up With Their Big Ideas" from ... read more

Bureaucracy At Its Worstlegal Argument At Its Best

( culture / humor )
Part of rebuilding New Orleans caused residents often to be challenged with the task of tracing home titles back potentially hundreds of years.. With a community rich with history stretching back over two centuries, houses have been passed along through generations of family, sometimes making it quite difficult to establish ownership. A New Orl ... read more

Sold Another Bumper Sticker!

( culture / humor )
Man, that's three this year. At a dollar apiece, I'm gonna be rich! :) UPDATE: That was at Zazzle, but now I recommend CafePress (once it's set up). ... read more

Fastest Trooper

( culture / humor )
Montana State Trooper In most of the United States there is a policy of checking on any stalled vehicle on the highway when temperatures drip to single digits or below. About 3 a.m. one very cold morning, Montana State Trooper Allan Nixon responded to a call.There was a car off the shoulder of the road outside Great Falls, Montana.H ... read more

Doormats With A Difference

( culture / humor )
... read more

A Few Bumper Stickers!

( culture / humor )
And one t-shirt, too. That's not me in the picture. :) Here's my store: zazzle.com/holmes3804 UPDATE: That was at Zazzle, but now I recommend CafePress (once it's set up). ... read more

Detroit Bank Robbery

( culture / humor / crime )
Detroit PD should be ashamed! :) See Detroit bank robberyUPDATE: That old link is dead. Here's the new link ... read more

April Fool's Day Hoaxes

( culture / humor )
April Fool's Day Hoaxes/Friday Funnies/April Days Top 10 April Fools hoaxes SPAGHETTI HARVEST - Bogus item on 1957 BBC news show Panorama. Viewers seeking advice on growing their own were told to put spaghetti sprig in tin of tomato sauce. SAN SERRIFFE - Guardian newspaper published seven-page supplement celebrating the Ind ... read more

Jokes

( culture / humor / jokes )
Images Joke-related posts, ... read more

Stupid Sayings

( culture / humor / jokes )
Save the whales. Collect the whole set. A day without sunshine is like, night. On the other hand, you have different fingers. 42.7 percent of all statistics are made up on the spot. 99 percent of politicians give the rest a bad name. I feel like I'm diagonally parked in a parallel universe. HONK if you love p ... read more

Lawyer Jokes

( culture / humor / jokes )
Courtroom Capers   Mary Louise Gilman, editor of the National Shorthand Reporter, has collected many hilarious courtroom bloopers in two books (Humor in the Court (1977) and More Humor in the Court). .newspaper -webkit-columns: 60px 3; -moz-columns: 60px 3; ... read more

Ice Fishing

( culture / humor / jokes )
Saturday morning I got up early, put on my long johns, dressed quietly, made my lunch, grabbed the dog, slipped quietly into the garage to hook the boat up to the truck, and proceeded to back out into a torrential downpour. There was snow mixed with the rain and the wind was blowing 50 mph. I pulled back into the garage, turned on the radio, a ... read more

Barbecue Season

( culture / humor / jokes )
After months of cold and winter, we are finally coming up to summer and BBQ season. Therefore it is important to refresh your memory on the etiquette of this sublime outdoor cooking as it's the only type of cooking a real man will do, probably because there is an element of danger involved. When a man volunteers to do the BBQ the following cha ... read more

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